A Turn of Events & Metro Logs
It’s been awhile since my last entry, and it feels good to be using wordpress once again. To be honest, I’ve been busy. So busy in fact that I’ve begun to neglect aspects of my existence that I hold in highest regard. As always, I seem to spend my life in transit, sitting next to people who I don’t know and feel nervous around. Like many others I take the metro (subway) for 2 hours everyday.
One small benefit of long commutes is the chance to sit down and think without feeling the pressures of being unproductive. The only thing I try to produce during my commutes are cloudy thoughts and cynical critics of mass society. I try to sketch down my ideas and read them when I get home from work. More often than not they have little value, but sometimes I find the odd snippet that is funny and amusing. For example:
1. Running to catch a subway is so fucking cliché that I try to never do it. I just don’t want to be that guy on the other side of those doors who is standing there like an asshole, his greatest efforts running got him nowhere and he is now a mockery to everyone on board the metro.
2. I have a hard time understanding anyone that stills wears religious garments – it is such an explicit public declaration of faith that went out of vogue in the 17th century, I find it fascinating and terrifying at the same time. Unless they know something I don’t I’m inclined to call them crazy. Why hasn’t God told me what to wear?
I’m going to try and get back into this slowly. It’s been awhile and I would like to have a graceful entry. Now it’s time to drink some coffee and be productive.
Home at last…
This last month has been a bit of a blur. It started in Berlin, walked through Paris and ended in Montreal. I met new people every day and slept in shared accommodation with my fellow man. I was a part of the trend, you know… the one where you backpack through Europe and find yourself in a moment of intense and absolute self-realization.
I’ve had none of these moments. Mine is a story of isolation and bitterness with subtle fragrances of fleeting ambition. Meeting new people can be so draining, I exchanged stories with so many people, leaving a little piece of myself with each person I met. Now I am back in Montreal and enjoying the idea of permanence. It’s nice to have friends that you can keep.
I’ve started working with zest to create an album. It’s so much harder than it should be. Sometimes I have bouts of confidence, but in general, I find it hard to take myself serious. I often ask myself, ‘why do you feel important enough to presume that others would enjoy listening to the sounds you make.’ It’s a good question, but an attitude that successful musicians can’t take. The new Radiohead album is very nice, and it felt really good to buy it knowing that all the money would go directly to the artist.
Anyways, time for my morning routine, it’s almost 1pm. Time for sickening amounts of coffee, a glance at world news, and a bagel with cream cheese.
[Found the image below in a museum in Paris. I think it s especially creepy, and I am glad I come from a time where this sort of stuff does not make sense]
Amsterdam
Well, nothing much to say today except for the strange fact that I am writing this from the inside of the Amsterdam redlight district, enjoying the liberial laws of this great country. Marajuana, Bikes and nice beer with 24-hour shops. I want to move here…
The Quest for Authenticity in the Age of Plastic
As I looked into her eyes it became clear that something was missing from her life, there, somewhere inside her body, was an empty space that had been mined of all its authenticity. Years of advertising and mass produced plastic trinkets had taken its toll; she no longer understood what it meant to be genuine. Wal-Mart, McDonalds, Suburbia, and Reality Television have a way of emptying heads and refilling them with plastic, taking away our human zest for individualism, adventure and significance.
Did you see that Britney Spears shaved her head? The Osborne’s swear a lot. Did you see who got kicked off American Idol last night? Paris Hilton is in jail again. The Hummer H2 is a huge SUV. Scary Movie 3 is so funny. Do you like my new shoes? This band’s tour has been sponsored by Honda. Wal-Mart sells DVD players for under $20 dollars. I’m going to a 5-star resort in Cancun for week. Sorry, I drink Coke not Pepsi.
What has happened here? Have we so easily succumb to the trivial whispers of the plastic life? There is more than this; there is authenticity and real feelings and events. Authenticity is not something that can be entirely bought from superficial profit seekers. It must arise from within, from a community with real people and places to go. Yet, amongst the ruins of authentic living there is a rising resistance. Some of those among us are starting to understand what they are missing.
One of the clearest examples of this can be found on those who wear vintage clothing. It is a reaction, ever so slight. It is something that cannot be fabricated overseas in China. Even Starbucks, so highly contentious, has built its image based on the authentic cafes of Milan. People want to be creative; they want freedom from the cookie cutter suburbs and the grinding sameness of corporate franchises.
I found this interesting quote yesterday, I think it may be one of my favorites:
-Walt Whitman-
I think I could turn and live with animals, they’re so placid and self contain’d, I stand and look at them long and long. They do not sweat and whine about their condition, They do not lie awake in the dark and weep for their sins, They do not make me sick discussing their duty to God, Not one is dissatisfied, not one is demented with the mania of owning things, Not one kneels to another, nor to his kind that lived thousands of years ago, Not one is respectable or unhappy over the earth.
Cheap Trinkets
Everywhere the streets are bustling as people try to have adventures. My adventure today is a small one, I’m sitting in my normal spot, methodically sipping my coffee as the crowd walks by. It seems that each person has a destination, as I will in around 20 minutes when I leave for work.
The mix is strange; the crowd consists of tourists, performers putting up their promotional fliers, and disgruntled locals who are sick of all the foolish and shallow sightseers. Tourists do not seek real adventure, instead they seek reputation. They want so badly for everyone to know where they have been. They want proof in the form of souvenirs. Intelligent locals exploit this fact by selling tourists ‘local’ items that have been imported from China. These are usually nothing but cheap trinkets.
I am guilty too, except I don’t want cheap trinkets, even if I could afford them. Instead, I take pictures of things, hopefully things that are interesting in some way. I imagine that any important area of Edinburgh has already been photographed a million times by people with better eyes and cameras than me.
It’s time to have a destination. I’ve had my release and have mentally prepared for the grueling onslaught that will numb my mind for 11 hours. It will be nice when I can stop working to live.
